Lazy Day~

There's always things to do for girls,

No matter how much they wanted a day off~

House works~

I believe this haunts every ladies or girls on earth,

Including me~

No choice~

On my lazy rest day,

I still need to do something~

Haunt with a smile~~ x)

And ,

I quite don't know why,

I wish to leave myself messy today,

Including my hair~

So I just let the turning fan to blow my hair,

And don't even mind to comb it back~

=D

Haiyaya~

So lazy to do homework~

Lazy to study~

Lazy to update blog~

Lazy to do everything~

Just wanna play~~

=__________=

Blinded~

Sometimes I really do pity you.

It's because you were unaware of your surroundings.

It looks perfectly fine to you, with jokes, friendly provokes....

But you never know what the true meaning of those.

The true meanings I have known way before you and I...

Too bad it wasn't for you to know

And that is why

I will stay by your side

And be your guardian~

Confused with Excitement~

I can say, I haven't had a real laugh for quite a time, but today i did!! Thanks to my two dummy friends Siew Wen and Ong. They are the best! I love the fact how we can laugh just by looking each other because we don't need to speak to understand each other. I love the fact how we keep laughing and laughing, stopped for a while, and then laughed again. I love how we did something childish together. Laughing like this is so much harder to endure than doing 100 sit ups. Furthermore, we laughed for more than 1 hour, but we still can't stop. Worse, i'm still smiling like an idiot while typing this.... ==~ Still, what a laughing day~!!! =D

I'm waiting!! Just one more week, and my life will be carefree!!!! FOREVER~~~

Ahh damn I'm shaking again. Because of yesterday's training I guess. Although I was quite worn out, I had quite a lot of fun. Kai Ni and Liu Xuan was there but Guan Shao was not. His reason was because he can't wake up early. == DAISEI give teacher scold!!! xD Quite a tiring day training, because we trained extra lot. A costume rehearsal, and quite excited that time. When teacher said that I was in group A, Han Wei shouted :"HARH??!" == Lol he thinks I'm in the same group as Cui Yi (group B) because I still look like a little girl. He made everyone stare at me, my coach, the little kids, parents....suikak!!! =____= Also, thanks to Aidan for giving me some chemistry notes, although he is a useless banana, but kind, but still useless. USELESS AIDAN LALALALALA~~!!!

To someone, please stop staring at me with your puppy eyes, because I will be stupid enough to forgive you~ ==

Hate that my hand keep injuring when competition is near. Hate when I gain more and more fatigue as days gets closer. Why is it everytime during competition, I'm not at my best state? I do hope to recover, but don't know how. I rested, but fatigue is still there. Hope my state won't be like last year, i wish to be at my best state, and do my best on that day, just to see what I can really do. Quite excited ahaaaa~

Lastly, I hate you, LIM LAI FA... ==~

Wrong Decisions~

Sometimes, I think back about what I have done which brought me to this stage of myself today. And everytime I think about it, I regret. Never once I felt that i have made good decisions, but only things which brings me down, or furthermore i have to say, pulling me apart from who I am. Sometimes I wished i can go back in time, and relive my life. I would never take the same path ever, never try to impress someone who doesn't appreciate it, never wasted my time for being hurt by someone who does know the meaning of acceptance, blaming others for what I don't understand, telling everyone who's my best friend when I'm not that person.........so much more....

Right now, for this stage of my life, i lived everyday with struggle. No one will know, because I don't want anyone to. I felt like I lived everyday just to survive. Survive the decision I truly regretted. Everyday is a pressure, but I dare not tell my true feeling to anyone, because it's not something simple to talk about. This decision has made me hate everyday....even on my special days, I don't have a sincere happiness, because this pressure has pierced into me, as I can say, permanently for my teenage. Everyday I hope that days and years can go by even quicker, so that I can end all this misery, this pressure. Truth to be told there is a moment I cried every, single day....but i guess I just got used to it....

Every person has a secret which they can't tell. True, because I'm one. The only reason even my own very best friend still didn't know because all they saw that ever since i made that decision, i grow into a different level, a higher stage, a stronger attitude, a better endurance, but despite all this, they don't know what is the pain to get through to achieve all that. Because now I've learnt that happiness is the most important thing of all. I dare say that I'm willing to give up all that I've achieve, to live my life carefree.

Actually, I do have a decision. To move on, or to give up. To move on is to fight for happiness everyday to my point of view, but for others, to be a better pride. To give up only means that thing which gives me pressure wins by seeing me running away from their arrogance, and critics, and also to dissapoint the one who gave me this chance for a good purpose. But despite that, I gain happiness and free time. I don't choose to dissapoint the very person I respect and my parents for the exchange for my happiness, and I choose not to be a coward, so i choose to sacrifice. Sometimes, I really admire my friend who is restless and busy just because of tuitions. I prefer being them than to do what i'm doing. At least they don't feel i'm feeling. At least they don't cry everyday because of pressure and to fake smile. At least they are not facing everyday like a fight to survive pressure......