I Still Feel Like Crap~

I seriously don't know what's going on with me. Even though everything is over, I still feel the same, feel like there still a heavy burden within me, which I won't be able to remove no matter what I do. I told many people just to seek help, perhaps to help me feel better, or perhaps someone will know the solution, or maybe someone will understand me and stand y my side. But no. After I cried, every single one of them though I was okay. Even I myself though I was okay already, but no. I comes back after two or three days. And this has struck me for more than a year already.

Sometimes its really hard to hold back my tears and end up crying in the public. People stare at me, but I don't even want to bother them. At home, when no one was around, I cried really loudly, and i even shouted once.I don't even know what to do. I don't even know who to find. I don't even know how to express what I'm feeling. Therefore when someone ask me why when I cried, I remain silent, because I don't know how to put my words together.

One person is so so dumb enough to keep asking why I cried so many times this year even though I keep telling that I have stress so many times. And that alone makes me feel that crying alone is better than crying in front of somebody else.

I felt left out. Like no one can understand me. And I don't know what to do. I really don't know what to do.